When death becomes imminent, you become someone like tomorrow is not going to come. It consumes your whole being especially when it is someone you really care about. Like our mormor. Mormor, is when translated in english, means Mom's mom or in our layman's term, Grandma. She is actually my hubby's grandma but I have grown to love and care for her just as much. I remember a few weeks ago when we visited her at the home, she was still very vivacious and even raced with us with her walker. It was a special moment for all of us because she was really happy. Like a child who got her fist bike!

The most special memory I have of her was when I just moved here in Sweden. It was a very dark and cold winter and moving from Bahrain where it was always warm and sunny, and where I was always surrounded by familiar faces, the dreariness and loneliness just got to me since I had yet to make friends. And knowing that, sweet Mormor ran after every dark-haired, asian-looking lady in the city, talked to them and got their phone numbers, in the hopes that they'd become my friends. Believe me, swedish people are not generally that friendly but she did it for my sake and I am so thankful for that. She was also the first one who gave me the warmest hug in the family, the kind like I was her long-lost-daughter sort of hug. I never felt awkward around her nor felt out of place. She was always so loving, warm and sweet to me.

During her last year as she suffered from memory-loss due to Alzheimers, she could not recognize anyone in the family anymore but except me. And everytime I visit her, she lights up like the sun and remembers me like we haven't even parted.

When I learned that she died in her sleep a couple of weeks ago, I felt sadness so heavy in my heart that my tears just wouldn't stop flowing. I will never be able to see her sweet face, get her warm hug, and hear her laugh. I will never be able to hang-out in her place, eat her special baked sweets and talk about nothing in particular. But as the world continues to turn and life goes on, I will always remember her unconditional love for us and I appreciate it everyday that she was a big part of my life.

Rest in peace, my sweet Mormor. I love you.